Conversation #3

qwerty: You're not really a procrastinator or a whiner or disjointed or an obsessive addict. You're just looking for flaws you can be proud of.

zxcvb: Ah, yes. You know me so well.

qwerty: This won't drive you off a cliff again, will it?

zxcvb: Hey, don't give me ideas.

qwerty: You know what's a good idea? Vowels on names. How do the hell do you pronounce zxcvb anyway?

zxcvb: You're off-topic.

qwerty: We have one?

zxcvb: ...

qwerty: ... ?

zxcvb: So, I had a dream last night.

qwerty: Me too. But I don't remember it.

zxcvb: I was in a hotel room with someone I didn't know. And we were both naked

qwerty: Ah. So it was a wet dream?

zxcvb: Not really. It's actually more boring than it sounds.

qwerty: That naked someone in the hotel room. It was me wasn't it? Haha.

zxcvb: I said it was someone I didn't know.

qwerty: I know.

zxcvb: ...

zxcvb: You really are sweet, you know that?

qwerty: Thanks. One of my better qualities.

zxcvb: It's your talent. You can charm the fuck off anyone's balls.

qwerty: What does that mean?

zxcvb: I don't know. I just ... wanted to say it. Just thought it sounded bad ass. :D

qwerty: I bet you rehearsed that too. In front of the mirror.

zxcvb: Nah, just in my head. Twice.

qwerty: Cute.

zxcvb: One of my better qualities.

Conversation #2

hellgod: Hey...

You're still here.

asdfg: Yeah. I thought my plan over. Didn't quite pan out.

hellgod: What plan? Oh, the sell your soul to the devil, get rich quick plan?

asdfg: On second thought, it just didn't seem like a good idea.

hellgod: Well, in my book, any plan that involves suicide as step number 1 is usally not a very good idea.

asdfg: It's not exactly suicide... I mean, I still get to live... I just have to be the devil's bitch, that's all.

hellgod: mmm... doesn't that sound so much better.

asdfg: Yeah... Doesn't it?

The next time I get another idea like that one, just kill me instead?

hellgod: Sure, no problem. But that's one favor you owe me.

hellgod: I'll be seeing you then... Alive I hope?

asdfg: I'll be around...

hellgod's phone rings. It's his friend, a part-time hooker/waitress/linesperson in Amsterdam who sells sharks, pugs, mosquitoes and semi-used underwear on eBay. She wants him to send her a rosary, the one with six mysteries.

"Give me 9 hours"

He hangs up.

The next time he looks up, he'll find asdfg gone.

They will never see each other again.

Conversation #1

hellgod: hey...
asdfg: hey
hellgod: I hear you're selling.
asdfg: How did you know?
hellgod: So you are selling.


hellgod: Why? I mean, why to him.
asdfg: He pays well. And I need the money. so...
hellgod: You know there's no backing out once you sell. You're never getting it back
asdfg: I know that. You don't need to tell me. I don't need to be told.
hellgod: Would it even make sense if I try to stop you?
asdfg: Try.

asdfg: I make my own decisions. I kick my own ass. I save my own skin. Same as you.
hellgod: No... that's not the way I do it.
asdfg: In a way.



hellgod: Well... call me when you get there.
asdfg: Definitely.

Or maybe, I'll see you when you get there.


hellgod: I hope not.