Saturday, April 2, 2011

Life in a duffle bag.

Life in a duffle bag. Eating pancit canton cooked by my mom. Emo at 4am.

In about 13 hours, I'll be leaving Manila and will be moving my life to Singapore. I should be excited, and to be honest, I think it's fair to say that March 2011 has clearly been one of the most awesome months of my entire life, and I can't wait for what April has in store for me.

But I just can't help myself from not feeling a bit down when I look at my now near-empty closet, and look at the two small bags that now hold all the carefully chosen stuff that I'll be bringing with me. I think it's the realization that I can't take the most important stuff in my life with me and put them in those two small bags.

The reason why March 2011 became a clear highlight in the timeline of my life wasn't really because I've found a job in a nice and shiny city, but because in the last two weeks, I've managed to reconnect with all my friends from most points in my life in a more profound way. We weren't just drinking because we wanted to get drunk (but yeah, that too...) We were drinking because we knew that the distance that was gonna exist between us after April 2 will surely affect our relationships, even if we try as hard as we can to convince each other that we'll be keeping in touch and nothing will change. We set aside a time to have dinner together because we knew that it's gonna take a long, long time again until we get to sit down in front of each other and just talk about our lives, and get what each other is saying without much explanation.

I can't help but feel down right now, at 4 in the morning, because I'm realizing how much I love these people (you) that I'll be moving away from, and your lives will move on, and my life will move on, and maybe when our paths cross again, we've already gotten used to not seeing each other, not getting drunk together, not eating together, or not understanding each others' jokes.

Fuck it. If you're still reading this up to here, could you do me a favor and not let that happen?

Also, thank you.